Jace to Face

I desperately want to like BMW. They take engineering seriously. They take quality seriously. They take driving dynamics seriously. They take the car seriously. Recently, though, they've tried to be less serious about car aesthetics. They've tried to add flair and panache, sex and candy, but they're German so it's all gone badly wrong. A few years ago, the revamped styling of the 7 and 5 were so controversial that the subsequent 3 committed a worse sin: it's boring looking. Among their most recent efforts, the all-new 7 and Z4 are far better resolved than their predecessors, but inside and out, they're still far off the beautiful bullseye. Somewhere down the BMW model continuum, the new X1 SUV is, inexplicably, appallingly hideous. How can the company that produces the inoffensive, even handsome X5 and X6 have gotten the X1 (and the X3) so badly wrong? How can they make the absurdly expensive and technologically obese 7 so mundane? There is clear, rock-solid evidence that BMW designers are brilliant. Look at this:


Behold, everyone: the BMW Concept CS. It's real. They were going to make it real for people like you and me, but then they decided not to. Explain to me, though, why that isn't the new 7. Why? Not practical enough? Too showcar-ey? Don't care. Not when it looks like that. I would gladly cut off my head to fit in the back so long as the rest of my body can be transported around in a car like the CS. And I think millions of dollars worth of consumers and their wallets would happily concur. So BMW, here's a tip. Hang whoever is coming between your talented design team and us. Then, draw and quarter their carcass. If you produce the CS with the cleverness and quality you're renowned for, I promise you will enjoy the financial reward.